Having taken the pain of looking for a job and finally getting that 1 interview call to be attended the following morning, which had come in my absence brought back a lot of things to life thrown away in frustration.
There were no details of the company or the job profile.I was fine taking that risk, as for someone..having waited..this looked like a ray of hope...
It had been a long wait. A wait that had unpaid jobs in between, different explorations, the instinct of taking whatever comes by, the slip between the cup and the lip which finally looked like all that wait would be worth it.
The D-day seemed bright than ever and I wanted to look fresh if not the best..I reached the said office and was asked to go to the company recruiting... I was still clueless.First instinct was to get back home.So much of uncertainty and lack of clarity. Then, the curiosity took over the instinct.
The bus journey to the said company was a long one. There was lot of ambiguity and a discussion and pondering happening with myself....First of all, I wasn't prepared and moreover..didnot know what to prepare for the interview.. it was then the slight unexplainable nervousness, anxiety that was cropping off. this was being transformed into the fear of rejection, to the fear of a longer wait, the fear of losing time, the fear of survival.
The halt of the bus brought me back to reality.I had reached the destination. I was taken aback to see where I had landed.It was the same place which I kept denying myself from going..& Lo..Behold !! I was there without my knowledge.Moreover, it was the one which I had thought was a bit too much for me to handle. Now, that I was there, I had no choice but to enter. The process had started & was asked to wait among others in that big room...There was another wait for my turn.
This wait was making me cold & I stopped thinking. Cold due to the A/C in the room & seeing other nervous faces made me stop thinking. Maybe everyone else sitting in that cold room had the same journey of trials, failures, disappointments,expectations mismatch and many more... as mine. Time just stopped there for a minute.
The door of the cabin opened and I knew...it would be me next to be summoned in. I mustered my courage, gathered my thoughts and walked in putting my nervousness aside. The testing time started and I was the question paper and the answer sheet both at the same time and opposite was my result. For the first time, it had ever happened that the result, Question & Answer paper were in the same place and at the same time together facing each other.
Time just flew by and finally the testing time came to an end. Once again I found myself waiting for the result earlier sitting opposite me to speak up and proclaim my performance. For a first timer, it was too much to handle and moreover the desperation to click. It looked like a longer wait than expected.The nervousness ghost kept coming back. before I could realize, I was called and asked to stay back.
That was the moment.That fraction of time in the entire 24 hrs clock period was the deciding moment & was the moment of SELECTION. The nervous strings within transforming itself into excitement & settling down & finally calming itself was an unexplainable feeling... The words of Selection kept ringing in my ears.
For that moment, it was the most important and precious word in the entire life. Now, after so many years..when I sit back and think of its reason of being so important , the only reaction is a smile.. there could be a lot of interpretations of that smile or it could be just a smile that brought back lot of fond memories of the journey that started with that one SELECT moment..which is still continuing... which looks forward in creating the same smile in its journey moving forward for now and years to come..
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All Rights reserved Lavanya M Rao
All Rights reserved Lavanya M Rao
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